A Pirate's Life for Me
by JeffroMattyHardy
Summary: Jeff Hardy is a Carolinian nobleman living in England. Adam Copeland is the notorious pirate captain, Edge. When Jeff is kidnapped, Adam takes on the role of teaching him to be a pirate. But when Jeff's father wants him back… Jedam, slash/language/alcohol
1. Kidnapped

_Title: A Pirate's Life For Me_

_Author: JeffroMattyHardy_

_Disclaimer: I own—OMG I own something! I own Alexis Michaels! Yes! Finally! Actually, I always owned her, so I don't think that really count. Darn._

_Summary: Jeff Hardy is a Carolinian nobleman living in England. Adam Copeland is the notorious pirate captain, Edge. When Jeff is kidnapped, Adam takes on the role of teaching him to be a pirate. But when Jeff's father wants him back… Jedam, slash, language, alcohol, violence_

_I actually got this idea when I saw Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides with Cody. Opening day, baby!_

_.*._

"Oi! First mate!"

"I have a name, asshole. Use it."

A blonde woman, her hair cut to jaw-length flipped out at the ends and falling over her left eye, glared at the man in front of her, her hands on her hips. Brown boots ended halfway up her calves, loose black pants taking over after that with a long piece of blue and white striped cloth around the waist as a belt. A white tunic-like top hugged her torso and a brown vest hung loosely over that. A sword rested on her hip and a gun right behind it. A bandana kept her hair out of her eyes and thin black fingerless gloves covered her hands. Alexis Michaels, the first mate on the ship, Rated R Opportunist.

The man she was glaring up at was the captain of the ship, Adam Copeland, or as pirates knew him, Edge. His long blonde hair was kept back with a rubber band, the top of his head hidden by a black hat. Black boots encased his feet and likewise brown pants on his legs with a thick black belt around his waist. A loose white shirt covered the top half of his body and a large brown coat went over that. Twin swords rested on both hips and a gun was tucked into the back of his pants.

"How far away are we from London, wench?" Adam teased with a grin.

Alexis growled low in her throat, hand resting threateningly on her sword. "You're such a bastard," she cursed. "And about 10 minutes." She spun on the heel of her boot and walked down the deck of the ship away from the captain. "Stupid Copeland," she muttered under her breath. "Calling me a wench."

"Edge getting on your nerves again?"

Alexis looked over and saw Jason Reso, Adam's younger brother by 2 and a half years. He was leaning on a mop and a grin was on his face, his short blonde hair spiked up with gel he'd stolen from a recent town. "I slept with him _one_ time and suddenly he's able to say whatever he wants to me," she muttered. "Should've never gotten drunk."

Jay laughed. "Just wait 'till we hit London," he said. "He should be out of your hair faster than you can say 'Blackbeard'."

**~.**.~**

"Jeffrey?"

Jeff Hardy looked up from his sketchbook when he heard his name called. He looked over at the door and saw his father, Gilbert, standing in his doorway. "Jeffrey, I'm going out for a bit," Gil said. "Will you be okay here?"

Jeff nodded. "If I need anything, I'll ask Matty," he replied. Gil nodded and walked out, leaving the blonde to his drawings.

Jeff and his older brother, Matt, were both Carolinian nobles, living in England because of their father's work. Jeff's light blonde hair was tied back with a black ribbon at the nape of his neck, his emerald green eyes trained on the paper in front of him. His black boots were sitting on the floor beneath his crossed legs. A pair of loose black pants were rolled up to his knees and a black vest was on over his bare chest. His pencil made long graceful lines on the paper on his lap, an eraser resting on his leg.

"Jeff!"

Jeff looked up when he heard his name once again. Matt stood in the doorway, his raven hair lying loose over his shoulders in a pair of brown pants and a white shirt. "Jeff, _what_ are you doing?" he asked, crossing his arms.

"Drawing." Jeff held up his drawing, a picture of a pirate with his hair and clothes blowing freely in the wind. "You like?"

Matt shook his head in disappointment. "Jeffro, what have I told you about drawing pirates?" he asked.

Jeff shrugged slightly. He stood up and tore the sheet out of his sketchbook, using a piece of tape to tape it up on the inside wall of his closet where his father wouldn't see. "Pirates are so much more interesting than the people here," Jeff whined, putting his things away. He lay back on his bed, yawning. "Imma go to sleep, Matty. Will you sleep with me?"

Matt rolled his eyes, but got in beside his brother in the bed. "You're such a baby," he joked lovingly.

Jeff just smiled and kissed his brother on the cheek. "Night, Matty," he said. He yawned again and snuggled under his blankets. Matt smiled and went to sleep himself with his back to the blonde.

**~.**.~**

"Hey, Adam! We're here!"

"Woman! When you speak to me, you will speak to me correctly!"

"Asshole. Captain, we're here."

"Better."

Adam grinned when he heard that. He looked over the side of the ship and saw London in the nearby distance. "What's the plan?" he asked.

"You know, pillage, steal, destroy, all that good pirate stuff," Alexis replied nonchalantly as she looked at her nails. "Rumor has it that there's a couple nobles from America living here."

Adam's interest was peaked. "Find them and bring them on board," he ordered, a grin growing on his face. "I'd like to meet these…American nobles."

Alexis nodded. She turned to look over the rail on the deck at the rest of the ship. "Alright, listen up you swine!" she yelled. The crew immediately looked over at her. "There's a couple nobles from America in London. Captain wants them as prisoners. Reso, Mizanin, Hennigan, you're with me to find them. Everyone else, take whatever you can find and destroy everything else."

"You are a wonderful first mate, love," Adam said. He lifted her hand to his face and pressed a kiss to the back of it. "What would I do without you?"

Alexis just rolled her eyes and pulled her hand back. "Trust me, you'd find a way," she told him. Adam laughed.

It took several minutes, but soon the Rated R Opportunist was anchored in the water and a couple boatfuls of pirates rowed their way onto shore. Adam chose to stay onboard, so Alexis had to take charge. She drew her sword with a sinister grin. "Have at it, boys," she ordered. Most everyone ran off, yelling with their swords drawn, but Jay, a man with spiked brown hair, and a man with shoulder-length wavy brown hair stayed with Alexis. "Let's go find some nobles."

**~.**.~**

Jeff stirred slightly when something broke downstairs. His eyes slowly opened and he sat up, yawning as he stretched his arms over his head. Matt was still asleep, snoring softly beside him. The blonde looked over when one of their maids burst into the room, slamming the door shut behind her. "B-Brie?" he asked, recognizing her a bit.

"Sir, pirates are here!" Brie cried, close to tears.

Jeff immediately woke up. "Matty!" he hissed, shaking his brother awake.

"What do you want?" Matt mumbled into his pillow. "Leave me alone."

"Matty, pirates!"

Matt shot up, blinking. "Brie?" he asked, noticing the maid in the corner.

"Sir, you and your brother need to hide!" Brie begged hysterically. "They're inside! They—They killed Nikki!" She burst into tears at the thought of her twin sister.

Matt immediately grabbed Jeff and shoved him in the closet, closing the door just as the bedroom door opened. Alexis walked in, grinning when she saw Matt standing in front of the closet. "Well, hello there," she said, walking closer. She pointed her sword at the raven, moving him away from the closet. "And who would you be?" He didn't answer. "Come on, don't you want to talk to me? Tell me your name and I'll tell you mine." He still didn't say anything. "Fine." She brought her sword up to rest against his collarbone. "Fine, tell me your name and I won't run you through."

Matt glanced at the closet, a motion that was no unnoticed by the blonde. "Matt," he said.

"You got a last name, Matt?"

"Hardy. Matt Hardy."

Alexis glanced over at the closet. "You hiding something in there, Matt Hardy?" she asked. The raven shook his head. "So…you won't mind if I do this?" She pulled out her gun, pointing it at the door.

"No!" Matt tried to move, but she pressed her sword against his neck threateningly.

"Don't move, Hardy," she warned, then looked at the closet again. "Alright! whoever's in there, come on out or Matt's dead!" The door slowly opened, Jeff peeking out fearfully. "Come on out." The young blonde hesitantly walked out. He immediately rushed over and hid behind Matt.

"I told you my name," Matt said, struggling to keep still. "Tell me yours."

Alexis smirked. "I'm a pirate, mate," she said. Jeff perked up slightly. "That's all you need to know." She looked at the door. "Jay!" Jay quickly walked in after a few seconds, sword drawn. She nodded at Jeff. "You take him, I've got the other." Jay nodded, taking Jeff out of the room. Alexis looked Matt up and down. "You remind me of a younger me, Matt Hardy."

"I doubt that," Matt shot back. "I was never a filthy pirate."

"Ever hear of a Texan noble by the name of Alexandra Shawn Hickenbottom?" Alexis asked. She circled around the raven, trailing the edge of her sword along his clothes.

"Michael Shawn Hickenbottom…He was kidnapped by pirates…" Matt's eyes widened. "Alexandra ran away." He looked at the blonde. "Alexandra Shawn Hickenbottom."

"At your service," Alexis said, mock-bowing to the raven. "Though, neither me nor my brother are recognized by those names anymore." She blinked. "Why…am I talking to you again? Come on. Ship's waiting."

**~.**.~**

"Oi! Copeland!"

Adam looked up from what he was doing when there was a knock on his cabin door. "We got your nobles!" Alexis called. He grinned.

Matt stood in between Mike (the brunette with spiked hair) and John (the brunette with shoulder-length wavy hair), Jeff slightly behind him. Alexis stepped back when the cabin doors opened and Adam walked out, his hand resting on one of the swords. "Excellent job, love," Adam said. Alexis just rolled her eyes and flipped her hair out of her eyes. Adam walked forward and crossed his arms, looking down at the two nobles. "So…names"

"That one says his name is Matt Hardy," Alexis replied, pointing at the raven. "I didn't get the other's name."

"Who are you?" Matt interrupted. "And what do you want with us?"

"Edge," Adam introduced with a cocky grin. "Captain of the pirate ship, the Rated R Opportunist, the deadliest pirate ship in the Caribbean, rivaled only by the Heartbreak Game." He motioned at Alexis. "And this is my first mate, the lovely Miss Alexis Michaels." Adam looked at Jeff, nodding at Jay. "And what's your name?"

"Jeff."

Adam looked up at Matt. "His name is Jeff," he repeated.

The blonde frowned and looked back at Alexis. "Can he not speak?" he asked. She shrugged. Matt suddenly rushed forward and grabbed one of Adam's swords, holding it out in front of him. "And just what do you think you're doing?"

"You will drop us off in London," Matt ordered. "Now."

"No can do, mate." Adam motioned around him. "We're out at sea now. No going back." He held out his hand. "Give me my sword before you hurt yourself."

"No." Matt's hands shook slightly. "Take us back. Now."

Adam chuckled, drawing his other sword. "Give it up. You can't beat me." He lunged forward, swords clashing when Matt barely pulled himself together in time. Adam kept lunging forward until Matt tripped over a board, his sword sliding along the deck. The blonde held his sword to the raven's neck. "Now, will you stop being a royal pain in my ass?" Matt hesitated, but nodded slowly. "Good." Adam slid his sword back in its place, catching the other as it was tossed to him and doing the same to it.

"So, what are we gonna do with them?" Jay asked, watching Jeff run to his brother's aid.

"What do you think?" his brother asked smugly. "We're gonna teach them to be pirates."

_.*._

_Done! Finally! Yes! *evil maniacal laughter*_

_And I just saw Bret "the Hitman" Hart at Over the Limit on Sunday! XD I can die happy. Lol:) _


	2. First Lesson

_Title: A Pirate's Life For Me_

_Author: JeffroMattyHardy_

_Disclaimer: I own—OMG I own something! I own Alexis Michaels! Yes! Finally! Actually, I always owned her, so I don't think that really count. Darn._

_Summary: Jeff Hardy is a Carolinian nobleman living in England. Adam Copeland is the notorious pirate captain, Edge. When Jeff is kidnapped, Adam takes on the role of teaching him to be a pirate. But when Jeff's father wants him back… Jedam, slash, language, alcohol, violence_

_I am on a writing_ ROLL_ lately! xD lol_

_This mainly focuses on Matt and Alexis this chapter. Sorry 'bout that._

_.*._

Alexis watched from the upper deck of the ship as Matt and Jeff came out onto the deck below, looking around for someone to talk to. It had been a day and a half since they'd left London and this was the first time they'd come out of the cabin Adam had given them. "Hey, Copeland," she called, not bothering to look behind her at the captain. "Hardys are up."

"Finally." Adam came up beside her. "I was starting to think they'd never come out of that goddamn cabin." He frowned when he watched. "What the fuck are they doing?"

"Probably looking for you." Alexis leaned over the balcony. "Hey, Hardy and Hardy!" The brothers looked up at her. "Get up here!"

Matt walked up the stairs to the upper deck, Jeff right behind him as he hung onto his brother's shirt. "Finally accepted your place on my ship?" Adam smirked.

"What are we doing here?" Matt growled.

"You're nobles," Adam explained. "That means that you don't know _anything_ about being pirates. And I need a challenge. I've already done it once with Alexis, but I need a better challenge. You two are unwilling. That makes it fun."

"We will _never_ become pirates," Matt said firmly.

Adam laughed. "You'll be singing a different tune soon enough when we dock in…"

"Ducos," Alexis supplied.

"Right, Ducos. Tomorrow." He looked the brothers up and down. "I'll be teaching…Jeff. Alexis, you'll teach Matt."

"Hell no," Alexis immediately said, crossing her arms. "Why can't you teach both of them and leave me out of it?"

Adam pulled Alexis toward him to whisper in her ear. "Come on, love," he pleaded. "I want to focus all my _attention_ on Jeff."

"You just want to fuck him," the blonde shot back.

"Well, yes, and his brother seems a little particular to you. So why don't you teach him to be a pirate like I taught you and try not to kill him."

"I promise nothing."

"Fine with me." Adam looked at Jeff with a grin. "Come with me, Jeff."

Matt stepped protectively in front of his brother. "What are you going to do with him?" he growled lowly.

"Exactly what the lovely Alexis is going to do with you. Teach him to be a pirate."

**~.**.~**

Adam closed the door of his cabin when Jeff walked in, taking out both his swords. "You gonna speak now?" he asked, holding out one sword. Jeff hesitantly took the weapon, but still didn't say anything. "What will it take for you to speak?" No answer. "Will you talk for a kiss?" Jeff breathed in sharply, something that didn't go unnoticed by the captain of the ship. "Oh, so that's what you want. A kiss, isn't it?" Jeff still didn't speak and Adam grinned. He grabbed the younger's arm and pulled him close, kissing him roughly. Adam's grin stayed on his face when he pulled away, watching the younger struggle to breathe normally again. "You gonna talk now?"

"O…Ok," Jeff finally said, his voice soft.

"Better." Adam smiled and lifted Jeff's chin with the tip of his sword. "You know, you're pretty cute." Jeff blushed. "And you're gonna be even cuter as a pirate." He took his sword away and drug his sword on the ground as he circled. "So, do you know how to use a sword?"

"I…Matty and I took fencing lessons when we were kids," Jeff said softly.

"Well, at least I won't have to teach you from scratch." Adam lunged forward, grinning when Jeff blocked the attack with his sword and spun around to try and get the upper hand. Metal clashed loudly as they fought. Adam finally hit Jeff's sword hard enough that it flew out of his hand and lodged itself in the wall. He held his own up to the younger's neck, nicking his face slightly. "You are a good opponent," Adam panted lightly. He noticed the blood slowly dripping down Jeff's face. "Here, let me get that."

Jeff didn't say anything as Adam set him down on his desk and wiped some of the blood away. He reached into a drawer and pulled out a strip of cloth and a couple pieces of tape, settling them over the cut. "There, good as new," Adam said, giving the bandages a kiss. Jeff blushed darkly, not moving as the older walked back to stand in front of him. "You've got some skills, Hardy, I'll give you that. You've got some skills." Jeff didn't say anything. "Are you serious? You're not talking again?"

"Do you have any paper?"

Adam was taken back with the question. "Um…what?"

"Do you have any paper?" Jeff repeated softly. "And a pencil?"

"Why?"

"I want to draw you."

**~.**.~**

"Can't believe I have to teach this fucking noble how to be a pirate," Alexis muttered under her breath as Matt followed her to her cabin. "Fucking Copeland can't teach two nobles. No. I have to fucking teach one myself."

"I _can_ hear you, you know," Matt said. "And it's not like this is my dream either. I'd rather be back home then on a filthy ship learning to be a filthy pirate."

Alexis suddenly spun around with her sword drawn and pushed Matt up against the side of the ship, her sword at his neck. "You will _not _say that pirates are filthy," she said threateningly. "I am _not_ a filthy pirate. I was a noble that chose to be a pirate because the life I lived was the worst thing I've ever experienced."

Matt gulped slightly. "If I do everything you say during this "lesson", will you answer my questions?" he asked, trying not to move.

Alexis thought about it for a second. "Fine," she reluctantly agreed. "But if you call me a filthy pirate one more time, I'll castrate you and I'm not kidding." She moved away from the raven and slid her sword back in its place. She spun around on the heel of her boot and kept walking. Matt followed her into her cabin, shutting the door behind him. "Now, if you're gonna be a pirate, you've gotta look like a pirate." She pulled open a few drawers and threw some clothes at the raven. "Here. These should fit you."

"Can I ask some questions now?" Matt asked. Alexis nodded, sitting down on her bed and grabbing a notebook from under her pillow, flipping open to about the middle. "Why did you run away?"

Alexis took a deep breath. This was the first time she was actually going to explain the whole story to anyone. Even Adam didn't know the whole story. "Shawn wasn't kidnapped," she started. "He fell in love."

— _Flashback—_

_Shawn tapped his foot impatiently as he leaned against his bed. He had met this guy, Hunter, at the docks a few months ago and every time Hunter came into port, he met up with Shawn and the two had a romantic day together. Shawn knew he was a pirate, but he didn't care. He was in love and he was old enough that his parents couldn't control him._

"_Hey there, sexy boy."_

_Shawn immediately straightened up, a smile instantly coming to his face when a figure appeared in his doorway. A tall blonde man pulled himself into the room and leaned against the wall with a grin on his face. His clothes were dirty and a sword glinted against his hip. "Hunter," Shawn said happily. He strode forward and gave the taller blonde a kiss. "What took you so long?"_

"_Sorry, baby," Hunter apologized, wrapping his arms around the smaller blonde. "Soldiers are out looking for me so I had to be careful." He smiled and kissed Shawn again. "I could never leave you, sexy boy. And I've got an idea." Shawn looked curiously up at him. "I'm gonna steal you. You'll come with me on my ship. Be my first mate so I'll never have to leave you again."_

"_Shawn?"_

_Shawn and Hunter looked at the doorway. Alexandra was standing in the doorway, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. "Shawn, what are you doing?" she asked sleepily._

_Shawn pulled himself out of his pirate's arms and walked over to his sister, resting his hands on her shoulders. "Alexandra, sweetie, I'm gonna go with Hunter and you can't tell anybody," he told her. "Can you promise me that?"_

_Alexandra's eyes filled with tears. "But…but…" She threw her arms around Shawn and started to cry. "I don't want you to leave!"_

_Shawn smiled warmly and looked her in the eye. "Alexandra, I love Hunter," he told her. "And I can't live like this anymore. All these rules and all these things I have to abide by. I can't take it anymore. I _need_ to get out of here, Alexandra and I need you to understand that. do you understand?" Alexandra nodded. Shawn smiled again and kissed his sister on the forehead. "I love you, Alexandra." Alexandra watched as Shawn grabbed his jacket and followed Hunter out the window and out of sight._

—_End Flashback—_

"And you ran away two weeks later?" Matt asked, pulling on the boots she'd tossed him.

"Yep." Alexis shut her notebook.

"What happened then?"

—_Flashback—_

_Alexandra pulled her jacket tighter against her body, shivering against the wind. She had thought long and hard about what Shawn had said and didn't want to live in a society she'd been forced to follow. That's why she'd run away and come down to the docks, hoping to find someone to take her away._

"_Well, hello there, darling. What are you doing here this late?"_

_Alexandra spun around. Adam was leaning against a post behind her, a grin on his face. "What's your name, sweetie?" he asked._

"_Alexandra," she replied softly. "Alexandra Shawn Hickenbottom."_

"_The noble?" She nodded slowly. "This is my lucky day." He walked closer. "How would you like to become a pirate, Alexandra Shawn Hickenbottom?"_

—_End Flashback—_

"Changed my name to Alexis Michaels and Adam taught me everything I needed to know," Alexis finished. "And now I'm gonna have to teach you."

"How do I look?"

Alexis looked over. Matt was in a pair of scuffed black boots with some dark blue trousers over them, a long strip of multicolored cloth holding them up at the waist. A thick brown belt was under that and a black tunic-like shirt was on his torso, a blue vest over that. "Looks like everything fits," she said appreciatively. "But there's one more thing." She reached beside her bed and pulled out a sword. "Do you think you can handle this?"

"Just…answer one more question," Matt said, delicately taking the weapon. "Where is your brother now?"

"Last I heard, somewhere near Ducos with Hunter," Alexis replied after a few seconds of thought. "He's now the first mate on the Heartbreak Game." She lazily looked out the window. "Okay, let's just pretend I taught you how to use a sword, you failed, and we're all happy, okay?"

"Fine."

**~.**.~**

Adam looked over when Alexis walked toward him, Matt right behind her. "Jeff!" the raven yelled in concern, rushing over to his brother when he saw the bandages on his face. He spun around and glared at Adam. "What did you do to him?"

"We just had a little accident with a sword," Adam replied. "Don't worry about it." He looked at Alexis. "How did your lesson go?"

"He fails at swordfighting, but that's normal," Alexis said smugly with a side glance at Matt. "He's just a stuck-up noble after all."

_.*._

_This is getting fun. This story and Camp WWE are the main things I'm working on right now and I have lots of ideas for both:)_


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